Birth Order

I find studies of birth order fascinating. I have twin sons, age 6 and a daughter,
age 3. The description below applies completely to them! Check it out! Click here!

1. The Eldest Overview
First born children are a bit like crash test dummies. Parents are learning with
every experience. The baby comes into this world and Mom and Dad both look at each other and say, “What do we do now?” Natural instinct takes over. However, there is certainly a steep learning curve when it comes to raising your oldest child.

2. The Eldest - Natural Leaders
According to author and renowned psychologist Dr. Kevin Leman, first born children are often high achievers, organized and detail-oriented. He states they are natural leaders because more was expected from them. In turn, they expect more from themselves. “They’re the movers and shakers of life and they lead everything from the PTA to the U.S. Presidency.”

3. The Middle Overview
“Marsha, Marsha, Marsha.” The most famous example of the perils of being the middle child. Everything always seems to be about somebody else. At times, they can feel like the odd man out in the family. They are constantly trying to live up to the eldest’s legacy and dealing with the magic charm of the youngest. This usually makes for a mentally strong human being later in life…or someone who is insecure.

4. The Middle - Entrepreneurs
Dr. Leman claims that middle children have the best psychological chance to become entrepreneurs along the lines of Bill Gates, Donald Trump or Steve Forbes. They are good listeners, negotiators and people-pleasers. He also states, “They are the most loyal friend on the face of the earth.”

5. The Youngest Overview
They can’t lose position in life. The youngest child is the last and reaps the rewards of that. Moms especially hold on to their youngest as long as they can. The baby of the family almost always has the unique ability to get away with just about anything. There is a prevailing attitude in the family that wishes to protect the youngest at all costs - even when it’s not rational. The baby learns that lesson early and applies it well. The most laid-back folks on earth are usually last-born kids.

6. The Youngest - Always The Star
In Dr. Leman’s analysis, last born children are usually happy people. They are likely to end up as entertainers, in just the family, or as their chosen career. Famous examples are Ellen DeGeneres, Eddie Murphy and Whoopi Goldberg. They are the least likely to wind up as President of the United States. The youngest child is usually very outgoing, manipulative and very good with people.

7. The Only Child
In a special class is the only child. Minus any sibling rivalry, the only child gains the benefits of both the eldest as well as the youngest. This, of course, can be a great thing or a curse. For instance, the solo child tends to lean towards a self-centered existence. And is spoiled at times. However, they also mature much faster and are generally special achievers.

8. The Only Child – a Superhero
Dr. Leman states that, “Only children are super first borns. They’re little adults by age seven.” They are sensitive and their feelings can be hurt very easily. In many cases, they do not get along well with children of their own age. They prefer older classmates or even adults as friends. “The only child has a great chance of being extremely successful.” Famous examples include: Albert Einstein, Lance Armstrong and Elvis Presley.

9. Twins
The mysterious children. Twins, especially identical, usually have a very deep connection with their sibling. They feel each other’s emotions and thoughts as if they were their own. In most cases, twins never lose a close relationship throughout life. For this reason, twins are often times very well-adjusted adults. They have a deep sense of security that stems from being born with a soul-mate intact. Quite a gift!

10. The Other Side of the Coin
Despite the truth of all the research and facts regarding birth order, they are
not the only factors at play. Many aspects go into the development of a child’s
personality and the adult they will eventually become. Gender. Age gaps. Race. Social status. Religious beliefs. Married parents. Divorced parents. Many, many things. Suffice it to say, human beings cannot be pigeonholed into set molds. We are all created with our own unique gifts and purposes.

holy doppelgangers

Wow. My sister, Sarah, and I have doppelgangers!!

Doppelganger: a ghostly double or counterpart of a living person

Harper Lee

"Harper Lee did have help in writing To Kill a Mockingbird. It takes nothing away
from her accomplishment to realize that the dynamic interplay between individual
effort and structural support is particularly pertinent to Lee’s story. Writing is
like most important things: individual greatness matters, but it’s not enough by
itself.”

Read more: http://www.newsweek.com/2010/07/30/one-hit-wonder.html

Today is the 25th anniversary of St. Elmo's Fire. One of my all-time favorite movies, I saw it the summer before the 8th grade. The characters would be about 48 now... I would imagine their lives would have turned out something like this:

Billy: nearly bald, but given his denial of adulthood, still keeps what little hair remaining on his head long and stringy, and still rocking the hoop earrings. likely has a beer gut too, though I'm sure he'd still be wearing those same torn tank tops on stage while saxing it up, likely at some cheesy "jazz bar" like sessions 73. blows his money every night on 7 or 8 beers at the bar while he tries to pick up 20-something girls, who mistaken him for Kenny G (which, shockingly, sometimes gets him some action). Used to stop by the frat house at the old college every year until 1993, when they refused to let the old man inside the house anymore.

Kirby: was promoted to manager of the pizza place in 1989, but his career has stagnated since. Still lives with a roommate in an apartment somewhere, but has finally been able to afford a car. shockingly has not yet found a girlfriend. Is a fiend for online dating, and has become an effective online stalker for girls who spurn him.

Jules: dead.

Alec: scandal-ridden political career stymied when he was caught up in the Madoff scandal. His junior league wife ends up leaving him after discovering that he was hooking up with his interns, taking what little money he had left. Has two sons, who both hate him, refuse to let him shack up in their homes, knowing that he'll probably try to sleep with their girlfriends.

Kevin: never got over Leslie, and wrote a couple of novels with her as a central character. Said he was okay with her wanting to be on her own, but kept harassing her and, in 1990, she took out a restraining order on him. Friend Kirby told him that he shouldn't take no for an answer, urging him to instead follow her and express his love until she finally chooses to be with him and, with that advice,he started stalking Leslie. Now serving 5 years in jail. But still writing! Working on a new novel about a woman who falls in love with her stalker...

Leslie: became a lesbian. Ended up hooking up with Dale Liberman, sending Kirby into a rage. Can't believe she ever hung around with these fools, and hooked up with a psycho (Kevin) and, even worse, a Republican (Alec).

Wendy: ended up marrying someone completely different from Billy. Lives a sterile home life, with a boring husband and three kids, running a greeting card company from her father. Still, despite this, she looks at Billy now and is extremely thankful that she didn't end up being with him (although she is glad to have been deflowered by him while he was still young and good-looking).


PS This August is also the 25th anniversary of Teen Wolf too. Nothing really to say about that movie except that I bet Boof turned out to be a pretty hot older woman...

all joy and no fun: why parents hate parenting

Fascinating article about parenting in New York Magazine... Makes me think of Claudia in Baby Proof--and the first line of that book. "I never wanted to be a mother." My writing partner, Kevin Garnett, and I just finished the screenplay. Very exciting!